PURE, UNADULTERATED HORROR!!!
That is what you feel, when the System Alert balloon on the Desktop of your computer flashes. Big, bright, yellow, a triangle with an exclamation mark. Yup, that one.
Two years of Computer Science, and yet, it all proves useless, when a big, bright, yellow triangle is flashing away.
Then again two years of Computer Science, isn't of course, two whole years, since we bunked more often than we should have. But if I may say, a text book, again, does not help when a big, bright, yellow triangle is flashing away!!
Our trusted home computer, has suffered much, in the one year, that it has been left in my care. I'm pretty sure, it would rather have my brother Cliff, stay home, instead of miles away, just so that it was spared this routine torture of an anti-virus going through all it's thousands of files and folders.
Clifford is known to be quite the computer whiz, keeping our computer clean and free from viruses, even seeing the signs, much before anything serious happens.
And then there is me, who thinks the computer is just having a bad day, when it works slower, or hangs from time to time. And mind you, I'M the on who's "studied" the subject of computers :P
The last time, I had to call Ashish to nurse my computer back to health. He did. It took a couple of hours, over a span of three days to fix it. Yes, the problem was THAT huge. "C: drive" was totally destroyed or some such thing. He made sure to make fun of me and let me know what a complete idiot I am. "Who uses the internet, without having a proper anti-virus"....Ahem...ME?!?!
And yesterday, this "Virus Heat" thing, told me I had 174 virus threats on my PC and that I should register and clean it up. I ran the anti-virus I already had and it found only 3. I began to hyperventilate, wondering what was wrong. Keep in mind, this time Ashish is all the way in Hyderabad, hence he's unavailable. I make a coupla long distance calls to Charlene, who by the way, was in a hospital delivery room, or somewhere close to one. In case you're wondering, no, I wouldn't be crazy enough to ask a woman in labour, for advice on how to clean up a virus. "ehh Charlene, I know your a little busy right now, but I was just wondering, could you tell me how....*in the background* "Once more Charlene, one more, one, two, three..PUSHHH!!" Hmmm come to think of it, that would be hilarious. But, no, Charlene's cousin, Jenny, was having a baby. Not that you need to know, but Jenny had a baby boy :)
So Charlene tries to figure out what I'm babbling about. (I tend to do that, even more so, when there's a big, bright, yellow triangle flashing away..
Sadly Charlene was unable to make any sense of my nonsensical babble.
So next I decide to do something on my own. What a BAD idea!! This'll never work!! Oh by the way, during all this time, the warning continues to pop up on the screen at regular intervals, like the boogie man out of nowhere...."MWHAHA, i got you now, lets corrupt some files"
And then! Thank God for the internet, it might give you viruses and everything, BUT, you can also talk over long distances, with brothers who live in Dubai!! I frantically type out everything I have come to learn about this wretched boogie man, and all the symptoms my computer seems to display, while at the other end, Cliff does is research on what exactly could be causing this sudden outburst of big, bright, yellow triangles...
And it has to be said, it took him just a couple of minutes to figure out what was wrong. Which leads me to believe, either he's really good at this, or I'm just plain stoopid!
FINALLY, it turns out "Virus Heat" WAS the virus, and was trying to trick me into registering for the ANTI-VIRUS, which claimed it could get rid of the 174 viruses, fake ones that too, that were supposedly attacking my computer, which would in fact, be the very VIRUS that would cause more problems..
Yeah...ahem...I was kinda stupid enough to fall for that trick...ahem...
So finally, after numerous instructions, and restarting my computer in "safe mode" (yes, I have learnt, that you can actually do that) I was finally able to rid my poor computer of the plague, and big, bright, yellow triangles finally stopped flashing...phew!
What have I learnt after all this you ask?
I need to update my anti-virus, and QUICK!!
Friday, April 4, 2008
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
The only constant thing in life, is change!!
Last week, I attended a school reunion. I was pretty excited about it, since I've lost touch with almost everyone I knew in school, so when I heard about the reunion, I knew I was gonna go for sure. It'd been 3 years since I'd met anyone, and really wanted to know what everyone was doing with their lives.
It wasn't a big group of people, just about 45 people showed up, the others were either too busy, out of town, and some couldn't care less. Nonetheless I doubt anyone was gonna let that ruin it.
It's very awkward when someone yells your name from across the room, walks upto you with a big bright smile, and asks you how you are, and what you're doing....you proceed to tell them the goings on in your life, and then suddenly it strikes you, like a brick in the face, "Oh no, whats her name?!?!" You're brain then starts to scan all the "faces" you know, searching for a name tag. Was her name Apurva? or no, wait I think it was Tripti? or Anoushka? This process might take from a few seconds, to a coupla minutes, and all this while, all your face muscles manage to do is force a smile, whereas your brain is a mess, busy sorting through it's long term memory folder, which is, at the moment, out of order.
And then you say, "Sooo....umm whats up with you?" You can avoid the embarrassment, you don't HAVE to address her by name. Just act casual, ask normal questions, "Where are you now? What college are you in? What courses are you doing?". You know, the usual.
What you don't count on, is her asking you, "You do remember me, right?" Dammit! I think that forced smile might have given it away! Now what? You say, "Ofcourse I remember! Don't be silly." Laugh nervously. I bet that expression on your face says, "Oh come on!! It's been 3 long years since I last saw your face, OKAY, so I don't remember your name. What I do remember, is that you got slapped across the face, by Ma'am Delphine, for "dae-dreamaing about sillae bai's (boys)" Yeah that Delphine, was and still is quite a bitch! Meanwhile you're brain is a storm of random names, or actually just a tornado or random words. Don't ask why, but for some unexplainable reason, I thought of see-saws!!
And then,just when you think it's over, a shrill voice from across the room goes, "Oh my God!! Tripti Bajaj!!" TRIPTI!! I knew it! TRIPTI BAJAJ! How could I have forgotten? The girl was infamous! Saving grace! The forced smile, turns to one of relief. All you say is, "Go ahead, I'll catch up with the others. Have fun"....WALK AWAY, WALK AWAY NOW!!!
Phew!
All in all the reunion was fun. You realize just how much has changed, when all you talk about, is what happened in the past, bunking classes, hanging out in the auditorium, getting punished under the soapnut tree and kneeling all day! Ma'am Celine falling off the platform while taking Biology class, amoung many others.
In one way a lot has changed, just like they're supposed to, just like you knew they would. But on the other hand, somethings haven't changed at all. The quiet, shy girls are either still the same, or have come out of their shells a little too much. The sluts are still the sluts they used to be, now maybe they have a mobile phone and are on the pill. The rich kids, still the rich kids obviously, they ofcousre always had mobile phones, though now, they have better ones.
And then there's that group of people you hung out with, everyday of your life, for more than 10 years. You haven't seen them in mor than 3, and yet, not much seems different, Shanu's got her nose pierced, Renuka, is still the bubbly, over excited, thing she always was. Josini, has past way beyond the already high score she had on the smart-o-meter.....And all of a sudden you miss everyone.
It wasn't a big group of people, just about 45 people showed up, the others were either too busy, out of town, and some couldn't care less. Nonetheless I doubt anyone was gonna let that ruin it.
It's very awkward when someone yells your name from across the room, walks upto you with a big bright smile, and asks you how you are, and what you're doing....you proceed to tell them the goings on in your life, and then suddenly it strikes you, like a brick in the face, "Oh no, whats her name?!?!" You're brain then starts to scan all the "faces" you know, searching for a name tag. Was her name Apurva? or no, wait I think it was Tripti? or Anoushka? This process might take from a few seconds, to a coupla minutes, and all this while, all your face muscles manage to do is force a smile, whereas your brain is a mess, busy sorting through it's long term memory folder, which is, at the moment, out of order.
And then you say, "Sooo....umm whats up with you?" You can avoid the embarrassment, you don't HAVE to address her by name. Just act casual, ask normal questions, "Where are you now? What college are you in? What courses are you doing?". You know, the usual.
What you don't count on, is her asking you, "You do remember me, right?" Dammit! I think that forced smile might have given it away! Now what? You say, "Ofcourse I remember! Don't be silly." Laugh nervously. I bet that expression on your face says, "Oh come on!! It's been 3 long years since I last saw your face, OKAY, so I don't remember your name. What I do remember, is that you got slapped across the face, by Ma'am Delphine, for "dae-dreamaing about sillae bai's (boys)" Yeah that Delphine, was and still is quite a bitch! Meanwhile you're brain is a storm of random names, or actually just a tornado or random words. Don't ask why, but for some unexplainable reason, I thought of see-saws!!
And then,just when you think it's over, a shrill voice from across the room goes, "Oh my God!! Tripti Bajaj!!" TRIPTI!! I knew it! TRIPTI BAJAJ! How could I have forgotten? The girl was infamous! Saving grace! The forced smile, turns to one of relief. All you say is, "Go ahead, I'll catch up with the others. Have fun"....WALK AWAY, WALK AWAY NOW!!!
Phew!
All in all the reunion was fun. You realize just how much has changed, when all you talk about, is what happened in the past, bunking classes, hanging out in the auditorium, getting punished under the soapnut tree and kneeling all day! Ma'am Celine falling off the platform while taking Biology class, amoung many others.
In one way a lot has changed, just like they're supposed to, just like you knew they would. But on the other hand, somethings haven't changed at all. The quiet, shy girls are either still the same, or have come out of their shells a little too much. The sluts are still the sluts they used to be, now maybe they have a mobile phone and are on the pill. The rich kids, still the rich kids obviously, they ofcousre always had mobile phones, though now, they have better ones.
And then there's that group of people you hung out with, everyday of your life, for more than 10 years. You haven't seen them in mor than 3, and yet, not much seems different, Shanu's got her nose pierced, Renuka, is still the bubbly, over excited, thing she always was. Josini, has past way beyond the already high score she had on the smart-o-meter.....And all of a sudden you miss everyone.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Okay, I have reason to be proud today!
I have finally got my drivers license, and no, not for a four wheeler. A goddamn TWO-WHEELER!! And that too after having to renew my Learner's license, THRICE!!
Now now before u jump to any conclusions about my driving skills, which by the way many people i know do not trust at all, because of the amount of times Ive met with accidents and fallen of the bike and once seriously injured myself and one of my friends Cynthia. If I may say though, most of these times that I've fallen off a two wheeler, I've been a pillion rider. Like the one time, we were driving to Westside to sing for the winter Carnival at Westside and Cliff dropped me when i was wearing a skirt into dirty water, my white t-shirt was black and torn, and I was forced to wear a jacket and sing "Jingle Bells" even though my butt changed colours from black to blue, to a very ugly purple-y colour over the next 2 weeks that followed!! I've actually only met with an accident, because of my own fault once, when I'd just learnt to ride right after 10th grade, once when a dog came in the way, and one other time when a few kids in the locality were learning to ride a cycle and I tried to avoid them. Ok, so thats a lot of times, but thats besides the point here!! The important thing to note here is that, all these times, I've been trying to save someone else from getting injured, namely the dog, the little kids etc etc....and you think Im just a bad driver!
The 1st time I made my Learner's license, forgot it had an expiry date and hence forgot to give the driving test in time! (Yes, see besides being selfless, Im also a law abiding citizen, who gives these driving test thingy's, while most others pay the dalal and somehow twist and turn the rules and get their permanent licenses without giving any such driving test) THEN, since the 1st license has expired Im forced to make another one, a Learner's again. This time I make sure I give the test before the bloody thing expires again. But alas, i FAIL!! The 1st "test" I've ever failed in, and it has to be a driving test!??!...In my defense though, the girl ahead of me knew nothing about Road Signs, every question was answered with a, "Sir, nahi aata" accompanied with one of those smiles thats supposed to mean, "Im just a pretty, innocent girl, won't you just let me slip by" And then this "officer" fails me!!...ME!! Just because I extended my LEFT hand when I was talking a LEFT turn! (now you ask whats wrong with that, for those of you who might not know, in India, officially, when your taking a left turn, you're supposed to extend your right hand, and rotate it, THAT is the signal for a LEFT turn?!!? Why couldn't they just use some common sense, and make it easier allow people just extend their LEFT hand when they take a LEFT turn?!?! doesn't that make more sense??!? Or just let them use the bloody indicator, what else is it there for?!?
Oh well, so I fail the test, and Im required to make yet ANOTHER Learner's license, if you've lost count, this is lucky number THREE!
SO today is the day, I go to give the test a second time, I attend the 1st class at college, I would have bunked altogether, but Kaalmegh is on my tail and would positively strangle me if i bunked one of her classes again! So i attend her class, and then bunk English to go give the test. The 1st time I gave the test, I had one of those guys from the driving school along with me, the 2nd time dad came along with me, this time however, everyone has just given up on me, and Im all alone. Nothing bad about that, except that at these government offices nothing ever seems to happen unless you know someone sitting behind the desks. I brace myself, telling myself I can do it. So what if i can't speak Marathi, I can still understand it! I then realize i spoke too soon, coz all the counter's are clearly marked, in Marathi, but it's not those simple words i know, "Majha naav Melanie aahe", now thats simple, but this was all gibberish to me!! Anyhow I ask around, making many rounds around the whole building in the process, and then of course, there is the occasional uncleji, who seems ever so interested in helping a "maydum" who has a completely clueless, almost desperate look on her face. Of course the uncleji who helped me out, referred me me as "baby", I guess he's pretty old then..
Paper work done, fees paid, now all I need to do is pass that blasted driving test!! (I hope your noticing the "law abiding citizen" bit again) DAMMIT, there's a line, a long one that too. Now what am i to do?? I have to get back to college at 1pm, coz this time Kekte Sir is gonna be on my tail, and he too will positively strangle me if I miss another class, and plus this time I've actually completed my assignment! I need a plan! I decide to jump the line, I casually walk upto random girl and ask her about whats happening and how we're supposed to go about his whole thing. I stand there for 5 minutes, asking questions at regular intervals, so as to not break the momentum. 5 minutes turns to 10, and before u know it, voila, it's my turn!...Smooth as ever, cool as a cat, or is is cool as a cucumber?..whichever. I give my papers in, do the "figure of eight" ride around. This time i make sure to indicate LEFT, by rotating my RIGHT hand! Funny how Im nervous, despite knowing there's no way Im not gonna fall off my gaadi or any such thing.
But it's finally over, I rush back to college just in time for Kekte Sir's class, oh well actually we was already in class, but i sneaked in when he was writing on the black board :)
Im smart AND I get my permanant license in 10 days! HA!
I have finally got my drivers license, and no, not for a four wheeler. A goddamn TWO-WHEELER!! And that too after having to renew my Learner's license, THRICE!!
Now now before u jump to any conclusions about my driving skills, which by the way many people i know do not trust at all, because of the amount of times Ive met with accidents and fallen of the bike and once seriously injured myself and one of my friends Cynthia. If I may say though, most of these times that I've fallen off a two wheeler, I've been a pillion rider. Like the one time, we were driving to Westside to sing for the winter Carnival at Westside and Cliff dropped me when i was wearing a skirt into dirty water, my white t-shirt was black and torn, and I was forced to wear a jacket and sing "Jingle Bells" even though my butt changed colours from black to blue, to a very ugly purple-y colour over the next 2 weeks that followed!! I've actually only met with an accident, because of my own fault once, when I'd just learnt to ride right after 10th grade, once when a dog came in the way, and one other time when a few kids in the locality were learning to ride a cycle and I tried to avoid them. Ok, so thats a lot of times, but thats besides the point here!! The important thing to note here is that, all these times, I've been trying to save someone else from getting injured, namely the dog, the little kids etc etc....and you think Im just a bad driver!
The 1st time I made my Learner's license, forgot it had an expiry date and hence forgot to give the driving test in time! (Yes, see besides being selfless, Im also a law abiding citizen, who gives these driving test thingy's, while most others pay the dalal and somehow twist and turn the rules and get their permanent licenses without giving any such driving test) THEN, since the 1st license has expired Im forced to make another one, a Learner's again. This time I make sure I give the test before the bloody thing expires again. But alas, i FAIL!! The 1st "test" I've ever failed in, and it has to be a driving test!??!...In my defense though, the girl ahead of me knew nothing about Road Signs, every question was answered with a, "Sir, nahi aata" accompanied with one of those smiles thats supposed to mean, "Im just a pretty, innocent girl, won't you just let me slip by" And then this "officer" fails me!!...ME!! Just because I extended my LEFT hand when I was talking a LEFT turn! (now you ask whats wrong with that, for those of you who might not know, in India, officially, when your taking a left turn, you're supposed to extend your right hand, and rotate it, THAT is the signal for a LEFT turn?!!? Why couldn't they just use some common sense, and make it easier allow people just extend their LEFT hand when they take a LEFT turn?!?! doesn't that make more sense??!? Or just let them use the bloody indicator, what else is it there for?!?
Oh well, so I fail the test, and Im required to make yet ANOTHER Learner's license, if you've lost count, this is lucky number THREE!
SO today is the day, I go to give the test a second time, I attend the 1st class at college, I would have bunked altogether, but Kaalmegh is on my tail and would positively strangle me if i bunked one of her classes again! So i attend her class, and then bunk English to go give the test. The 1st time I gave the test, I had one of those guys from the driving school along with me, the 2nd time dad came along with me, this time however, everyone has just given up on me, and Im all alone. Nothing bad about that, except that at these government offices nothing ever seems to happen unless you know someone sitting behind the desks. I brace myself, telling myself I can do it. So what if i can't speak Marathi, I can still understand it! I then realize i spoke too soon, coz all the counter's are clearly marked, in Marathi, but it's not those simple words i know, "Majha naav Melanie aahe", now thats simple, but this was all gibberish to me!! Anyhow I ask around, making many rounds around the whole building in the process, and then of course, there is the occasional uncleji, who seems ever so interested in helping a "maydum" who has a completely clueless, almost desperate look on her face. Of course the uncleji who helped me out, referred me me as "baby", I guess he's pretty old then..
Paper work done, fees paid, now all I need to do is pass that blasted driving test!! (I hope your noticing the "law abiding citizen" bit again) DAMMIT, there's a line, a long one that too. Now what am i to do?? I have to get back to college at 1pm, coz this time Kekte Sir is gonna be on my tail, and he too will positively strangle me if I miss another class, and plus this time I've actually completed my assignment! I need a plan! I decide to jump the line, I casually walk upto random girl and ask her about whats happening and how we're supposed to go about his whole thing. I stand there for 5 minutes, asking questions at regular intervals, so as to not break the momentum. 5 minutes turns to 10, and before u know it, voila, it's my turn!...Smooth as ever, cool as a cat, or is is cool as a cucumber?..whichever. I give my papers in, do the "figure of eight" ride around. This time i make sure to indicate LEFT, by rotating my RIGHT hand! Funny how Im nervous, despite knowing there's no way Im not gonna fall off my gaadi or any such thing.
But it's finally over, I rush back to college just in time for Kekte Sir's class, oh well actually we was already in class, but i sneaked in when he was writing on the black board :)
Im smart AND I get my permanant license in 10 days! HA!
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